A Hard Day

A hard day. A young woman did a telephone interview with Beth. Then she rang back and I spoke with her. She is 24 and addicted to both alcohol and drugs. She is on probation. She is pregnant. She is also extremely depressed and has tried to kill herself and her family said that they found another stash of pills and "good-bye letters" yesterday. Her doctor says that she has a history of abuse, is having anxiety attacks and hearing voices. We can't take her because she is pregnant. We do a cold turkey detox, and it is not safe for pregnant women. Nathan tells her that and she says she will abort the baby, she doesn't care.........Next thing she calls us back and says that she is no longer pregnant and is bleeding. We are all thinking, "what has she done?"
I interviewed a woman this morning with three children. They have been taken from her. She could not stop crying. I want to cry.
We have a new guy on the couch at Windmill, shaking so bad he can't hold his tea cup. The new guys have such sad eyes, full of despair and hopelessness.
We have what they need, but will they take it??? We have Christ, hope of the nations. We have prayer and love. Will they stay and take it?

Moving to Wythall

We move to Wythall in two weeks. Wythall sounds like saying whistle while holding your tongue. It is one of those commuter villages that has easy access to a major motorway. It is not as colorful as where we live now, in Shirley. At least it doesn't appear to be on the surface. There is a nice fish and chips shop and a lovely footpath that has beckoned to me for a while as I drive past. But here in Shirley, we have all kinds of neighbors, all ethnicities. We have a smallish Tesco at the end of our street which is very handy. There is a lively high street area with a park that always has families strolling around. We have lived here in Shirley longer than we have lived anywhere in the past three and a half years. We know our neighbors well enough to borrow things. Our next door neighbor - Mrs. Shirley- is a sweet funny widow who doesn't hesitate to tap on our door to have one of us open jars for her. I love that.
I prayed for a big wonky house. That is exactly what God has given us. Funny little rooms, not too run down, but not posh either. We will fill all six bedrooms immediately - with our family and three Betel guys. Pete and Bryan are like excited little boys on Christmas eve, waiting to move in. They keep popping their heads in my office at the center and asking questions. I hope we will all keep unity as our goal. I pray that we will be stretched and learn to form a family unit together. Please pray for us.

Kindness unlocks

I went to a women's conference today in Lincoln at New Life church. Margaret Stunt was the main speaker. Wow, what a breath of fresh air. She was profound and quite funny. But one of the things she said was "Kindness unlocks." Unlocks doors in the community, hearts of those close to you, family relationships.
She said that when we are secure in God's love, we don't have to worry about what others think. We can love the extra mile. Kindness preaches, we don't have to say a word.
Inversely, anger locks. Anger locks up our hearts in unforgiveness and bitterness.

I need to truly ingest this in my heart and spirit. God has given us the rejects of English society to love and sometimes that is hard. But kindness unlocks the doors to their hearts.
I really like that thought

Less expectations in the material world, more expectations in the spiritual world.
This is what it is like being a missionary.
I put less and less hope in what is material, what my hands can produce or secure, and more hope in what God will provide, trusting in His good Heart.
Very, very, achingly slowly, I am learning to do this. He is faithful, patient and kind to teach and provide, I am slow and dull. But this is one of the things I wanted to learn.
Spiritually, he is open cages and taking down walls in my heart, even though I try to crawl back into my cages at times. He is cutting away, pruning the pride, greed, selfishness and anger that infects my heart and spirit. Living in community, preparing to take two more men into our own house, is a huge challenge for me - the only woman in the group. Right now we have four sons, and Ken, who was in the Betel program, living with us. In two weeks, Brian and Pete will be added. They are both long term residents with Betel, who want to move out of the dorms, but want a place with accountability. I have to prepare my heart to welcome them, to not take offense at their personality quirks. I know that God is stretching my heart in all this. That is where I want to be : pressing in, stretched out of my comfort zone.

My shoes and socks are wet, soaked with whatever it is that is so constant here - dew or rain or just wet seepage. At lunchtime, Scott and l like to walk on one of the three footpaths around Windmill house. The one that we took today goes through three sheep fields (with lots of sheep poop), over four stiles, down an ancient roman road, until you meet up with the road going up Weatheroak Hill.
We past by cottages with names: Granny's cottage; Rose cottage, Dolphin House and dolphin barn.
We trudge past the Coach and Horse freehouse pub, and up the steep hill. Finally, we past the refurbished windmill in a pasture and duck past Windmill cottage onto the grounds of Windmill house. I love these walks. When coming down the hill, we have this beautiful view of rolling hills and more sheep fields. I love the view with the trees turning autumn colors.
Then when we get back in, we go to the tea room, a big closet with a sink. Usually a little grungy and unkept, it is where you start the kettle and make a wonderful cup of hot tea.

Ok, that all sounds very idyllic, and it mostly is. I have grown to love a hot cuppa, to understand why it is so valued in this damp, cloudy, cold country. Even in the middle of the summer, I still was drinking hot tea, because it was still cool during the day - high sixties and low seventies. That is cool for an Alabama girl. I have even learned to like it the way most true English take their tea - no sugar, teabag left in, and milky. That took a while, but since I love to eat a bit of chocolate with my tea, I wanted to learn how to forgo the sugar. And of course, PG tips is the tea of choice. YUM
Cadbury chocolate and a cup of tea. My friend Carol came over a couple of weeks ago and brought Hershey kisses with almonds. I have hidden most of them and am enjoying a couple every night with my last cup. Thanks, Carol!!